I’m not sure what it is about being pregnant but it really does bring out the worst in people. Even normally nice people. Pregnancy can turn your most socially adept friend into a blubbering ninny.
Here’s the scenario. You’re walking down the street and you see your significantly fat friend. You:
A) Comment on how heavy she has gotten in the last week.
B) Say hello and carry on.
C) Discuss the lovely shirt she is wearing and carry on.
2 of the three of these choices are perfectly acceptable human behavior, while the third is just a bit hideous. Common sense would tell most people that. However, when you are talking a pregnant woman these rules of common decency go right out the window!
In the last week I have been told that I have a) gotten so much bigger b) look like I’ve exploded and c) been asked how much weight I have gained since last week. The part that drives me a little batty is that these people are normally very nice and normally not socially awkward. But, apparently my ever growing state has thrown them off their game.
To add a little salt to my wounds, even my husband (love him) has not answered correctly when I was discussing my sadness over these comments. Hi response was more of a well… really…
THAT IS NOT HELPFUL! I want him to say no you are not fat, end of sentence. He doesn’t need to fix this or add anything else, just plain you are not fat.
And for the record, I am EXACTLY the same size I was with G at this same point. Same weight, same measurement. And back then these comments were very different.
But, I have 1 redeeming comment that I am focusing on. Janet at work told me yesterday that I looked really good, and did not look very big at all. (without any prompting, I might add)
Here is the lesson folks, pregnant or not, weight is still a sensitive issue. Baby or no baby, it’s self image we are constantly fighting. If I could snap my fingers, I would be a pregnant hottie, but alas I am just me. So if you must say something, go with glowing. That’s pretty universal and can mean anything… fat, thin, ugly, weird pregnancy skin, etc., it’s quite the word.
Update: This was found on the fridge write-on board. 🙂