I am a parent.
Today I am enjoying being a parent. My little girl is playing sweetly with her dollies and trying to tickle them and just being wonderful in general. She brings a smile to my face as she pushes her dolly stroller by and smiles at me. Today is fantastic.
Yesterday… yesterday I wanted to remove my ears from my head, rip out my hair and scream back. Yesterday my sweet adorable little girl (who’s ALWAYS overtired from daycare days) whined (quieter/constant screaming, not really whining, but we’ll call it that anyway), banshee screamed, cried, threw things, hit, scratched and screamed more for 2. HOURS. STRAIGHT. I wanted to run away and hide, leave the house, remove my ears, hide in the fridge, anything but listen to this awful sound coming out of my ahem… sweet daughter. I may have done some whine/screaming back. It doesn’t help, but it feels better for a few seconds.
I never imagined that I could have a tougher child than Big Brother. He’s quite the energetic child. He bit, hit and headbutted. He was stubborn and strong willed… and he doesn’t even hold a candle to Little Sister. The differences between them are stark. I never imagined the drama that could come from an 18 month old. The ear piercing screams (after Big Brother who would have thought it could be louder? IT CAN GET LOUDER). I ever imagined how hard this would be. I never imagined that the limits that were pushed before can be pushed even further now. I never imagined that a child could be more stubborn than me, my husband or my son… combined. There is just so much I never saw coming. And I never imagined I could survive being tested like this.
There are tough days, the ones that make you question every decision you have ever made.
But that was yesterday, and today is a new day… Tomorrow? That could be anything.